so... yeah.

When you come home and your kid is covered in charcoal and you ask him why his face, chest, arms, and legs are black, you don't really expect to hear, "I was doing it for camouflage because it was dark out, and I went into a dark room and I could hardly see myself."

But I suppose it's as good a reason as any.

just FYI

Everett would, "much rather be a fashion model than a yoga instructor."

I have no idea what brought that on, but he is absolutely certain of it.

if only

Everett gets on these kicks where he talks nonstop. It happens a lot: somewhere in the neighborhood of every waking moment. Oddly enough, I tend to tune him out at times. I find myself mindlessly agreeing to all kinds of absurd things, like a plan to build a rocket/submarine in order to explore the depths of the ocean and the far reaches of outer space. And then I have to quickly backtrack.

Anyway, I'm starting to wise up. This morning I was definitely paying attention. I was so amused I wrote the whole thing down while I was driving (Yes, it's entirely safe. Especially when traffic is moving at the furious speed of 15 mph).

So it went like this, "If only I were a better engineer, I could give the people of American Samoa a present - except most people here don't have coats - but I could give them a white Christmas. I'd have to fashion some kind of hyper shield or something to keep the snow from turning back into water. Records indicate there will be lots of water, I just need to make it turn into snow."

"Seriously. All I need to know is how to use some things that I'm not allowed to use yet."

Yes, there you have it. My 9-year old is convinced he can make snow on a tropical island. It's just those pesky adults and their rules that prevent all the fun. Well, and that whole thing about only being an average engineer. He really needs to get on top of that.

gotta love this logic

Simon: You think my mom has make-up?

Friend: Yeah, all moms do.

Simon: Are you sure my mom does?

Friend: She does. Otherwise she wouldn't have a husband.

*sigh* I love that kid

Julia: We have to remember to take that fan with us when we move.

Simon: Yeah, because it keeps us warm so we're not burning burning hot. We used to be burning burning hot. *sigh* I love that fan.

maybe random-sponse is more fitting

.. later on this week, still going on and on about paddling lessons.

Lisa: Wow, you're becoming a renaissance man with all the lessons you're taking.

Everett: What's a random-sponse man?

now that's a worthy aspiration

Everett: You know how I can't take sailing lessons until I'm ten? Well, I can take junior outrigger paddling lessons until I'm ten and then take sailing lessons and then I'll be this crazy boat guy!

close, but not quite

Simon (making cookies): We're going to put the cookie dough on the cookie mattress.

hey, my senses don't do that

Ruth (hiking back down Mt. Alava): We're getting close to the end.

Everett: I know. I can sense it with my senses. boop. boop. boop. boop-boop. boop-boop-boop. [getting faster as he gets closer].

I'm such a speed demon ;)

Clif (backseat driving): You don't have to be reckless and go thirty[mph].

So this probably needs some explanation. The speed limit here is 25 mph and most of the time there's some slowpoke who thinks that 25 is waaaay too fast so they go 15. And there are almost no areas where passing is allowed so you're just stuck. Apparently Clif's a little too used to it.

me too. because that would be really unpleasant, except for the flying car part

Me: I hope you have a good day at school.

Everett: I hope you have a good day at work, better than Harry Potter in Book 2 when his parents locked him in his bedroom and his friends had to come rescue him in a flying car.

floating your boat requires advance planning

Everett (surrounded by building materials, hammer in hand): I'm going to build a boat that's bigger than our whole house.

Paul: How are you going to get the boat to the water?

Everett (slowly stalling): That's an excellent question...

we're all mixed up too

Everett (explaining that Ila's a mutt): He's all mixed up. He's all different kinds of dogs.

and then turn yourself into a convex pentagon

Everett (telling Simon how to turn into a cocoon): . . . and now curl up so you're shaped like a ball and not a Simon.

what is the deal with those people and their cameras in the rain?

Simon: I hope tonight's not going to be like the last night the new babysitter came - with all the flashes and people taking pictures and thunder and rain.

we never exaggerate

Everett: I've had this cough a really long time, like, since I was three or four.

wacky school colors

Julia: You know how some school colors here are blue and white and some are black and yellow?

Simon: Yeah, ours are blue and wacky.

Julia: you mean, khaki?

Simon (nodding): Khaki.

oh, the technicalities

Clif: It's Thursday, right?
Simon: No, it's Thurs-night.

apparently the superhero phase isn't over

Everett: But mom, why?

me: Because I don't want you running down the road without supervision.

Everett: But I have my own Super Vision inside me.

eight-year-old humor

Simon: Don't spell booger!

Everett: Why? It's a snotty word?